Skip to main content

Me Addiction



I’m a recovering addict.  There I said it.  I’ve had this addiction for years.  I’m not proud of it.  In fact, I’m ashamed.  But its time it came out.

 
Hello, my name is Debi, and I’m narcissistic.

 
My addiction:  me. 
 
 
 
For you see, a me addition is all about me.   My way.  My turn.  My happiness.  My self.  Me.  I have had this “addiction” a long, long time - since I was born, in fact.

                  Psalm 51:5 says:  Surely I was sinful at birth, sinful from
                          the time my mother conceived me.

A me addiction is sin.  Plain and simple.  It’s totally against God’s will.  I’m trying to think of one scripture that supports it . . .  (thinking, thinking . . . . ).  Nope, can’t.

               Philippians 2 says:  Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain
                      conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves,
                      not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests
                      of others.  In your relationships with one another, have the same
               mindset as Christ Jesus:

               Who, being in very nature God, did not consider equality with
                     God something to be used to His own advantage; rather, He
                     made Himself nothing by taking the very nature of a servant,
                     being made in human likeness. And being found in appearance
                     as a man, He humbled Himself by becoming obedient to death-
              even death on a cross.

 

Valuing others above myself is NOT how a me addiction works btw and a me addiction is NOT having the mindset of Christ.  Not at all.  Its empty and it’s lonely and I hate it. 

Hating it was the start of my recovery.  Not hating “me” but hating the sin.  Hating the addiction and knowing there was better.  Maybe not how I thought it should be – but how God thought.  Knowing His love like no other.  Knowing He knows and still loves me.  It’s humbling, to say the least.  Another thing that helped was starting my mornings with a "Good morning, Jesus - today is all about You and not me.  PLEASE MAKE IT SO!"  Simple, but effective. You know what I mean?

Let me make this clear, I still take care of myself.  I shower and get my hair cut. :) I joined a gym.  You know things like that.  Its the motive, though.  It's why and its who's first.  I’ll be honest, I have my “pity parties” now and again.  But thankfully they are getting shorter and more seldom.  Its just too wonderful to do it God’s way.  Live in His grace, His mercy.  

Because it all is His, you know.  1 Cor 4 says in the Message:

For who do you know that really knows you, knows your heart? And even if they did, is there anything they would discover in you that you could take credit for? Isn’t everything you have and everything you are sheer gifts from God?

Embracing the love of God is the best thing you can do.  There’s no “me” there.  Just Him. 

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

It all started before that.

As she talked, I sat there amazed.   Not at what she was saying, but at who she had become.   Confident.   Godly.   Faithful.    Respected.   It just hit me that she is now a leader in our church.    A true leader.   The next generation of leaders, in fact. But wait -- is this the same young woman who God brought into our lives a little over 10 years ago?   The anxious, nervous, only-just-started-going-to- church- wanting-to-please-everyone young woman my son introduced us to?   Watching her confidently taking her seat, I started thinking of those first days . . .   and seriously, my breath caught in my throat.   How amazing God is!   He molds, He holds.   He shapes and He grows.   And He does this over and over – and it still amazes me.   That got me to thinking.   God’s amazing work in my life didn’t start with my daughter-in-love.   It started before that.   It starte...
1 comment
Read more

I prayed for toilet paper.

    I left for a LONG walk by myself recently while vacationing at my sister's place.   Armed with a bottle of water, it was a perfect morning to get away.  The sun was shining and the birds were singing - what could be better??   Having walked this path before, I didn't have a worry in the world. Praying, humming and taking in as much of God's creation as I could, all was good.   Well, until . .   My bladder was full and no bathroom was in sight.   I figured I was still about two miles away from the nearest bathroom.   What to do?   Two miles is a LONG WAY when you gotta go.   Some of you know EXACTLY what I mean.   Or maybe you don't have problems like this and if you did, you at least wouldn't tell anybody about it.   But the older I get, the more of a problem it is.   And the older I get, I know that EVERY event in life has a lesson.   Yes, even one like this   So I did what an...
Post a Comment
Read more

Obligation or desire?

I had a question asked of me yesterday that quickened my heart and left me wondering.  I'm still wondering for that matter.  It actually makes me a little sick to my stomach to think that I even have to question myself and admit this out loud.  But here goes . . . . . do I worship God out of obligation or desire? We are studying 1 Kings on Wednesday mornings and King Solomon is the main character.  He's the son of David (known for being the man after God's own heart).  Solomon loved God and worshiped Him.  In fact, Solomon was allowed to build God's temple and became one of the wisest richest rulers of all time.  I Kings says,   5  Three  times a year Solomon sacrificed burnt offerings and fellowship offerings on the altar he had built for the  Lord , burning incense before the  Lord  along with them, and so fulfilled the temple obligations. I'm thinking to myself, WOW, this guy's doing it all rig...
Post a Comment
Read more