Skip to main content

Me Addiction



I’m a recovering addict.  There I said it.  I’ve had this addiction for years.  I’m not proud of it.  In fact, I’m ashamed.  But its time it came out.

 
Hello, my name is Debi, and I’m narcissistic.

 
My addiction:  me. 
 
 
 
For you see, a me addition is all about me.   My way.  My turn.  My happiness.  My self.  Me.  I have had this “addiction” a long, long time - since I was born, in fact.

                  Psalm 51:5 says:  Surely I was sinful at birth, sinful from
                          the time my mother conceived me.

A me addiction is sin.  Plain and simple.  It’s totally against God’s will.  I’m trying to think of one scripture that supports it . . .  (thinking, thinking . . . . ).  Nope, can’t.

               Philippians 2 says:  Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain
                      conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves,
                      not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests
                      of others.  In your relationships with one another, have the same
               mindset as Christ Jesus:

               Who, being in very nature God, did not consider equality with
                     God something to be used to His own advantage; rather, He
                     made Himself nothing by taking the very nature of a servant,
                     being made in human likeness. And being found in appearance
                     as a man, He humbled Himself by becoming obedient to death-
              even death on a cross.

 

Valuing others above myself is NOT how a me addiction works btw and a me addiction is NOT having the mindset of Christ.  Not at all.  Its empty and it’s lonely and I hate it. 

Hating it was the start of my recovery.  Not hating “me” but hating the sin.  Hating the addiction and knowing there was better.  Maybe not how I thought it should be – but how God thought.  Knowing His love like no other.  Knowing He knows and still loves me.  It’s humbling, to say the least.  Another thing that helped was starting my mornings with a "Good morning, Jesus - today is all about You and not me.  PLEASE MAKE IT SO!"  Simple, but effective. You know what I mean?

Let me make this clear, I still take care of myself.  I shower and get my hair cut. :) I joined a gym.  You know things like that.  Its the motive, though.  It's why and its who's first.  I’ll be honest, I have my “pity parties” now and again.  But thankfully they are getting shorter and more seldom.  Its just too wonderful to do it God’s way.  Live in His grace, His mercy.  

Because it all is His, you know.  1 Cor 4 says in the Message:

For who do you know that really knows you, knows your heart? And even if they did, is there anything they would discover in you that you could take credit for? Isn’t everything you have and everything you are sheer gifts from God?

Embracing the love of God is the best thing you can do.  There’s no “me” there.  Just Him. 

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

The unthinkable

What's your "totally awful, most unthinkable thing"?  You know, the one thing that would be THE most awfulest thing in the whole world to happen.  Everyone has one, don't they?  I mean, I do.  Whether its relational or spiritual or physical - makes no difference - its the one "happening" in your life that would be the worst ever.  E-V-E-R. Its the kind of thing you don't want to tell anybody because you don't want to say it out loud, let along think about it.  But you do . . . I do anyway.  And especially now, for some DARK reason, with all that is happening around us, my mind goes there.  I don't want it to but it does. I think Peter's totally awful unthinkable was his denial of Christ - and his happened THREE times.  It must have just slayed him.  I wonder sometimes how could he have even gone on after that.  One word:  redemption. Where our unthinkable is, God's redemption is.  Our only hope - ...
Post a Comment
Read more

Right WHERE I wanna be!

Did you ever wonder what life WITHOUT God’s Presence would be like?   I mean, really truly WITHOUT HIS PRESENCE?   In my reading this week (Ezekiel) the exiles are coming home.   They are moving back to their “homeland” and to top it off, God’s Presence has returned.   Wait – what do I mean by God’s Presence returning?   Isn’t He everywhere?    Where did He go if He wasn’t there with them?   That’s a good question !   I have been thinking about that this week and the importance of “God’s Presence” in my life and in OUR lives as Christians. In the Old Testament, God dwelt (on earth) in the tabernacle first and then in His Most Holy Place in the temple that King Solomon built for Him in Jerusalem.   By “dwelling”, I mean He was there to worship and confess to.   He spoke to (and through) prophets.   He accepted sacrifices and worked in tremendous ways for His people.     Jerusalem was captured and the Jews...
Post a Comment
Read more

May my heart see . . . a blog? What?

My sister suggested years ago for me to start a blog.   “A what?”, I said.   Well, thank you, Cindy, for your suggestion – I think I’m gonna love this !   And I hope you do too.   I want to share what my heart has “seen” and is learning through God’s Word and I want to hear from you too.   The first time I EVER went to Bible study was when my “baby” was in an infant seat.   I remember it vividly.   (He’s 25 now BTW)    My step-mom invited me; she was the leader.   I don’t know if I would have went to a study where I didn’t know A SOUL – maybe.   Anyway, I have been going to a weekly study since then regularly and LOVE IT, absolutely love it! When scripture says “ open the eyes of my heart, Lord” – what do you think that means?   Hearts don’t have eyes, I mean literally they don’t.   My step-mom used to say, “I know it in here (pointing to her brain) but I now know it in HERE (pointing to her heart).   There’s a differ...
5 comments
Read more