May My Heart See...

I wrote this poem a couple months ago on contentment - hope you enjoy! I want to be in a place where its only You and me Your words - my ears. Your touch - my senses. Your love - my heart. My heart is open in this place. There is no deceit or any wants, nothing crushing me. I just know Your love! I can't see the place, I only see You. Contentment is mine. May your heart see that contentment is in Jesus!

It ain’t easy to be satisfied nowadays.    Even with five TV’s, a closet full of clothes, a man who loves me and three ADORABLE grandchildren, satisfaction does NOT come natural to me.   Wanting?   That comes natural.   Wanting to be thinner, wanting to be loved differently, wanting to have that house, that dress, that car.   Why is that?   Why do I want what I don’t have?   Why doesn’t WHAT I have make me happy or satisfied?   Did you know that we canNOT make our own contentment?   Nope, we can’t.   Now we can surround ourselves with people and stuff and projects and keep busy.   We can look forward to a good dinner or events to make us happy.   We can go to a counselor or read books or search for truth to help us cope – but we cannot make our own contentment.   The word, “contentment” as defined in Wikipedia is "enjoyment of whatever may be desired.   Contentment is an intuitive natural concept, and is self sustaining.”   Hmmmm, natural?   Self-sustaining?   I don’t buy that

Contemplating all the lessons learned over the years, one of my biggest “heart” lessons is the one about “leaving it there”.   Leaving what?   Leaving “IT” – What could “it” possibly be?   My children, my finances, my marriage, my health (now my parents’ health too), anything I hold on to and won’t let go.   THAT is what “it” is.             My first “leaving it there” lesson was when my first born, Danny, was an infant.   He was born with a defective heart.   Many of you know this story.   While we are at Mpls Children’s’ Hospital ICU, our pastor calls and prays with me over the phone.   I will never forget it.   He told me to “leave him there, leave him in God’s Hands”.   God will do what I could not do.   I felt good (PEACE) for about a minute. It felt good to not be in charge, to not handle.   Then I walked back to ICU and saw my baby, tubes and all.   My “peace” evaporated.      I guess, as I look back and remember the day he went into surgery three months later, I felt peace as t

Oh to be truly thankful for what I have and to have REAL expectations in life.   I mean, IF I am truly thankful for all that is given me (no matter what) – and to KNOW what is expected – doesn’t that sound peace-ful (full of peace) – wouldn’t that be a “slice of heaven” so to speak? I have a sweet granddaughter (Adalay) who is 10 months old, breast-fed and still not sleeping through the night.   She wakes up and needs comfort.   She’s hungry.   That’s reality.   To expect that she be comforted WITHOUT her mother – is that a REAL expectation?   Probably not.   I did have her for the night a couple weeks ago and we “made do” although we were up quite a bit (we took a delicious 4 hour nap later J ). Anyway, the REALity of it is that Adalay needs comforting in the middle of the night, albeit, with or without milk.   A lactation specialist has told my daughter-in-love that THAT is NORMAL – a REAL expectation for babies, even at 10 months old.   If we look at this as a REAL expectation, is i

My sister suggested years ago for me to start a blog.   “A what?”, I said.   Well, thank you, Cindy, for your suggestion – I think I’m gonna love this !   And I hope you do too.   I want to share what my heart has “seen” and is learning through God’s Word and I want to hear from you too.   The first time I EVER went to Bible study was when my “baby” was in an infant seat.   I remember it vividly.   (He’s 25 now BTW)    My step-mom invited me; she was the leader.   I don’t know if I would have went to a study where I didn’t know A SOUL – maybe.   Anyway, I have been going to a weekly study since then regularly and LOVE IT, absolutely love it! When scripture says “ open the eyes of my heart, Lord” – what do you think that means?   Hearts don’t have eyes, I mean literally they don’t.   My step-mom used to say, “I know it in here (pointing to her brain) but I now know it in HERE (pointing to her heart).   There’s a difference.   Head knowledge/heart knowledge. Everything I “know” in my hea